beyond the edge

Open it up in my heart...
Open it up in my...

When alone, the night tends to be especially black
When alone, the heart tends to quietly fragment
The cold hands tremble, the hot tears fall
When alone, one wishes someone could appear

When alone, it's like falling into a ravine
When alone, it's like seeing through all of the world's lies
Time won't go faster, details won't stop replaying
When alone, one fears that someone might appear

Lalala
Filthily accept my love
It's contemptible to liberally allow yourself be hurt
Dragging the wounds on a flight across the horizons
Leaving just yourself to return

Lalala
Sigh a long sigh for my love
No one wishes to leave you alone
But if the world is boiled down to only the passing of seasons
Possessing too much will also become unbearable

Lalala
Filthily accept my love
It's contemptible to liberally allow yourself be hurt
Dragging the wounds on a flight across the horizons
Leaving just yourself to return

Lalala
Sigh a long sigh for my love
No one wishes to leave you alone
But if the world is boiled down to only a passing greeting
Possessing too much will also become unbearable

When alone, the night especially tends to turn black
When alone, the heart especially tends to crumble
When alone, even though all the emotions can't...can't...can't be escaped
When alone, you still must force yourself, to let things be



攤在自己的心上
攤在自己的……

獨處的時候 夜容易特別黑
獨處的時候 心容易悄悄破碎
冷冷的手發抖 熱熱的淚墜落
獨處的時候 好想有誰能出現

獨處的時候 像跌進了深淵
獨處的時候 像拆穿全世界的謊言
時間不肯快走 細節不停穿梭
獨處的時候 好怕有誰會出現

啦啦啦
髒髒地收我的愛
讓自己慷慨地痛太不堪
拖著傷口飛越了桑田滄海
剩自己慢慢地還

啦啦啦
長長地嘆我的愛
沒有人願意丟下你不管
若世界說穿了只剩下春去秋來
擁有再多也會太難耐

啦啦啦
髒髒地收我的愛
讓自己慷慨地痛太不堪
拖著傷口飛越了桑田滄海
剩自己慢慢地還

啦啦啦
長長地嘆我的愛
沒有人願意丟下你不管
若世界說穿了只剩下噓寒問暖
擁有再多也會太難耐

獨處的時候 夜特別容易黑
獨處的時候 心特別容易崩潰
獨處的時候 儘管所有情緒都逃……逃……逃不開
獨處的時候 還是要勉強自己 想得開





Just a little intro - Sodagreen is a Taiwanese band whose main singer is a prolific songwriter and has a very remarkable falsetto. It took me a little while to get used to his voice, but there's no argument his songs are amazing.

My favourite album is their latest (from 2 years ago?) "Autumn: Stories". I think I read somewhere that they're going by the Vivaldi route so expect a Winter album to come soon.

Maybe because I'm an Autumn child (though technically I was born in spring...but now I have my birthday in autumn), or maybe because their music and lyrics have matured over the years. The songs in this album are appropriately filled with a sense of longing, melancholy, sadness and regret...like watching the sun dipping unstoppably below the horizon, like taking a walk through fallen leaves as the sound of wildlife retreats, like an old man (or woman) confronted by the reality of his age.

"When Alone" is not my absolute favourite song, but I think there's something universal about these lyrics.

We're living in a world that is more and more interconnected, but only electronically. We see more and more strangers, and more and more of our relationships are built through a screen. Even though we're constantly with people online, many of us are also frequently alone.

And I think, when most of us are alone, we all have these doubts, these fears, these thoughts that seems to take the world apart and strip it of warmth and truth and all good things, and I think it will speak to everyone who's thought of all these things and then forced themselves to carry on.

銀魂 is my silver lining in a dark dark cloud ^3^ (Stop it with the really bad pun already)

I had no idea they were doing reruns under the name "Yorinuki Gintama". I MISS IT SO MUCHHHH. Write faster!!! Sorachi!!!!

Sorachi: At least I'm not taking 10 month breaks every 4 weeks, like that other series you once liked starting with Hunter and ending with Hunter.

I LOVE THIS SONG SO MUCHHHHHHH it made me grin from ear to ear which is just what I needed today.



La la la~
It's okay~
You are fine just the way you are~
It's okay~
It'll go well~
Don't give up!


*BAWLS*

Alright, will dig back into my books tomorrow!

For ONCE Akanishi's solo English song is socially acceptable and people won't give you weird looks if you randomly start humming the lyrics on a crowded train. Well, they still would, but at least they won't try to get you hauled away for indecency.

Except I have no idea what it means even after reading the English lyrics. I'm not sure if it's trying to say anything, but it seems like it is, and I think a lot of people immediately associated it with the LA episode.

Well, "the motivation gets a little stronger"...you said it man, I'm holding you to it =__= At least cut your hair and stop looking like a goldfish ala sleeping with your eyes open during interviews. He didn't even blink when everyone admonished Kame for having his fly open in front of the camera and Koki tenderly(?) doing it up for him XDDDDDD

"Heart beat" is such an Arashi-like song, not least because the lyrics are so optimistic and sweet and joyous. I think I'm going to like it because of the lyrics ^^v I actually liked Kame's falsetto a lot more than Jin's (what's wrong with me LOL)...Jin sounded really thin during that falsetto bridge and the background music just swallowed his voice.

Yamanade 4 was once again unremarkable. It's starting to remind me a LOT of Atashinchi no Danshi, which I didn't like because in-between long moments of boredom there were flashes of goodness and I do not like waiting 45 minutes to see 3 second flashes of coolness.



Aye, back to the grind again tomorrow. I think ENT is going to be so boring after all the fun we had at ophthal. Half of me suspect we had so much fun at ophthal because we were trying to squeeze 2 weeks worth of learning out of 1 week, and there's nothing like a logbook that drives one's enthusiasm to rush things through. That said, the amount of paperwork is driving me up the wall and while the reg's are very nice about it, they obviously think it's ridiculous too. We have to get signed for every patient we see and every tutorial we go to. It's retarded. Ultimately you get out as much you're willing to put in and I think that alone is reward enough. Forcing people to have records of everything they've seen is such a mothering way of doing things and increases the work of everyone and decreases the enjoyment of everything. So much for "this is adult learning".

Firstly, ophthalmology is awesome. Not because that it is awesome or that its 9-5 office hour days are awesome and its $200/hr private consultations are awesome, but that the teaching is awesome. Although the other reasons are obviously good considerations for career path XD I hope I get to see a fluoroscein angiogram before I move on to ENT ♥

Secondly, I'm signing up to the hordes of fans who think that the PVs for "Love Yourself" and "D-motion" are ewwsome. I actually prefer "Love Yourself" (but I've only seen the previews for both so I might change my mind). I think my single discriminating factor is that Kame's hair doesn't look quite so fugly in "Love Yourself". I hail the Jin fan who called Jin "a fly with sunglasses on". NOW I CAN'T GET THE IMAGE OUT OF MY HEAD. I hope there's a legitimate reason for Kame not cutting his hair because he obviously thinks it's long since he ties it whenever he can =@ YOU BETTER GO CAMEO IN RYUUMADEN OR SOMETHING << you just want to see him with Fukuyama ==;

"D-motion" turned out less sugary pop than I thought, but I'm not into the whole electro-disco/Perfume type movement. But I liked the MS performance BECAUSE KAME TIED HIS HAIR UP (is it at all obvious how much my opinions of things hinge on his hair?) except it reminded me of the nosebleeding 1582 dance, especially the way he manages to sashay on the spot *facepalm* I wonder why so many people compare it to K-pop. I obviously don't listen to enough K-pop. In any case, KT has always equaled ass-shaking in my book even though it's really just Kame and Ueda. But Kame has been doing it before they debuted and I really don't think it has anything to do with K-pop =0=; The dance sequence reminded me more of some of Arashi's dances than anything else (apart from Kame's random bum shake LOL) At least they don't get off tune on "lives" any more << oi

Thirdly, Kame you still have no chemistry with girls *facepalm* Turning up the fighting between Sunako and Kyouhei was cute (and well overdue) though.


A: Hello
K: It's a bit cold but, is everyone doing gooooooooooooood
A: For a so-called "Mail Special", isn't it a bit ordinary?
K: Ordinary is the best

SUB: Baseball and soccer
Text: Kame-chan, Jin-kun, hello. A few days ago, about...about that!! I went to Johnny's Sports Day. As someone who has such bad luck with lotteries, I was very happy [TN: tickets are balloted]. The two of you, thanks for the hard work. I stood the whole time to watch, but I didn't feel tired at all~ Kame-chan was very active in baseball and Jin-kun in soccer. In fact I don't play either of them, I don't really understand so please tell me what the attractions of baseball and soccer are. Also, you must you must!! Hold another sports day next year. From kekkoukenoji

A: Yup
K: I want to do it next year too
A: It was fun I didn't play much baseball though so I wouldn't know
K: That's right It was fun
A: I've always played soccer, I just like it If you ask why, I don't know Well, it's the feeling Anyway it's just fun
K: Baseball, for each and every person there's a moment to shine Everyone being gathered together...nowadays I still play grass baseball but...after a match, everyone has a common conversation topic Like "That time you should've done this~", a moment in which anyone could be on common ground with each other, it's fun Playing as a team, becoming one, it's great

SUB: Valentine's
Text: Pleased to meet you. It's out of the blue, but what do you think about Valentine's? I think I am going to give three boys chocolates this year, but I think it's best to narrow it down to one person...I think, I'm a bit bothered. Enough of that (lol), I'd like to ask about memories the two of you have of Valentine's. You must have gotten a lot of chocolates~ Even though I can't use them as an example for what usually happens, but I'd definitely definitely like to know. Please tell me. From aryamakoryama

K: Valentine's is...for us...no, for me not something that I celebrate During high school it did happen, but since working in this job What exactly is Valentine's? I wonder
A: I don't remember much of it either
K: Such as someone to like...
A: Getting chocolate is good, not getting chocolate is also good Don't eat much sweets anyhow
K: Once you become an adult, occasions like Valentine's stop being an essential way of being a witness to your love You make your own special occasions ne Well, if you receive anything it's still something to be happy about
A: Yup See you next month


After extensive psychological profiling by me and my friend << uso desu, we have concluded that Kame is the creepy obsessive type who likes to celebrate random anniversaries like, "The first day I went karaoke with Fukuyama" and "The first day Kimura gave me a present" and "The first day I went to have ramen with Uchi" and "The first day Koki confessed to me".....(Jin: WHAT ABOUT ME?!) You? Who are you? XD

Kame really loves teams doesn't he ;__;

A lot of groups actually turned up to the countdown O_o; I thought Kinki Kids would be missing as usual, and Arashi and Tokio would be stuck at the Red/White showdown, but they were all there, even V6 weren't out eating ramen this time XDDD As always Takki was on video link, and this year Kanjani8 as well from Osaka...so NEWS ended up with only five people. To think that the group debuted with 9 people...Orz

Most of the songs were so natsukashii~ T&T even sang "Sotsugyou". I LOVED that song...but man it was so long ago, back in the days the first Inuyasha series was running. Inuyasha had such popular artists.

Yamashita looks really wasted ==;;; I don't know what's wrong with him. I keep mistaking (in longshots) Shige for him because I keep thinking he should look better than that. Is he really going into Code Blue 2 like that? *Palmface*

Toma appeared~~ Toma~~♥~~ He hasn't been onstage dancing in SO long...since 4tops split up? But he's in time with everyone else...Unlike Uchi, who is FAIL LOL.

Speaking of can't-dance-ness...LOL Kame, we all know you hate Shuuji to Akira, but try not to be so obvious about it XDDD Being about 1.5 beats behind everyone else, messing up the steps so badly that the poor Hey!Say!JUMP kid right behind you got confused too and messed up....tsk tsk! And Akanishi during Macchi's song...even though you cleverly hid yourself in the middle of the crowd, your out-of-time-ness is still really obvious since the people in front of you are shorter |||Orz

MatsuJun is so nice to Jin (and Toma~) XD Jin even pulled a 撒嬌 face...haven't seen him do that in soooooooo long ==;

The groups singing each other's songs bit was variously cool or hilarious XDDDD Arashi's rendition was probably the most on-tune version of "Sukiyanen Osaka" (K8) I've heard all these years =_____= It was so cute though XD In contrast, Kanjani8 singing "One love" (Arashi) had me curled up in my seat with my hands over my head. It didn't help that they were obviously doing a comedy version...My "One Love" T_______T What have you done to it T______T

I KNEEWWWW either KT would do NEWS' song or vice versa...uggghhhhhhh. This sudden KT/NEWS buddy-buddy act is starting to piss me off. Haven't heard the original version but at least KT singing together sounds on tune (unlike K8 who can't keep on tune even singing in a group...it's really scary actually Orz). Mr Akanishi again was...I don't know what he was doing =___= Not singing, obviously.

TOKIO singing KT's "Keep the Faith" sounds exactly as off-tune as it would if KT performed it................LOL.

年男 this year - Uchi, Massu and Kame, and poor Kokubun who is turning 36 so he wasn't put in the ranks. Aww...I would so want to see Koichi up there when he's 36 XDDD Tsuyoshi didn't shower him with flowers this year...awww...

The new trailers for Yamanade doesn't look too bad. Kame's character seems completely unrelated to Kyohei so far but he looks rather cute and cool and not annoying so I'm happy =v= I'd probably be less happy if I were a manga fan but thankfully I didn't like the manga LOL

And he (occasionally) ties his hair up =__= Thank god for that. Any chance they'll cut it halfway? *Crosses fingers* Kyohei had short-ish hair. I don't understand this long lank hair business Orz

Now, for the yearly recommends~

2009 Drama recommendations
1. BOSS
Nice cast (targeted more at the older audience), good pace, passable plot, broken up by cute funny moments and headed by a really cool female lead. That's all I need to be happy =v=
2. Ninkyou Helper
I never ended up finishing this because it's not my type of drama, but I think it's a good social commentary, and it avoids being cheesily positive as J-dramas tend to...and besides, Kuroki Meisa is HOT.
3. Voice
Not for everyone, but moving short stories about people and relationships are what the Japanese does best. Death and parting is always sad for those who are left behind, but this series says there is also hope, and it does so without forcing it down your throat.
4. Tokyo DOGS
I probably wouldn't have liked it much if it weren't about the only thing watchable this season (apart from that Jin doctor thing which I can't bring myself to watch). The plot is disorganised and there are too many loose threads, but it is at moments cute and engaging and gripping, although the switching between subplots tends to be jarring.
5. Mei-chan no shitsuji
This is extremely popular although I didn't actually like it much Orz Rihito is probably, to date, Hiro's best role, where his shortcomings in his acting skills are covered by the fact that he is only required to be self-possessed and cultured and courteous for the role. Arriving at the same time as Kuroshitsji, the two shows are responsible for the number of girls swooning over butlers serving English tea..............


2009 MUSIC PVs
These are personal favourites, not Oricon rankings, since Arashi took 4 out of the top 5, while KAT-TUN and Kanjani8 took 3 out of 6-10, making it a total of 7 Johnny's releases in the top 10 alone Orz

Not in order of preference, but in order to balance out the colours Orz These are my favourite PVs, rather than songs by themselves...

1. Juju ft Jayed - Ashita ga kuru nara
This is a song you could cry to, presumably why it was chosen for the 2839475th movie about someone young and beautiful dying of terminal disease. "If tomorrow comes, I don't want anything but you, I want you to smile, always." Besides...Eita ♥ Nana ♥
2. Exile - Futatsu no kuchibiru
Ending song to Tokyo Dogs. LOVE the chorus, no idea why. The PV is typical Exile style - visually impressive, high budget, and entirely irrelevant. (PS: this is the band that Gintama called "the 12 peopled omake" Orz)
3. GReeeeN - Setsuna
It was a toss up between this and "Ayumi", but I couldn't find the PV for it. Apparently no one knows who GReeeeN is except that they're four dentistry students O__o;;;; They do the sort of optimistic catchy J-rock that I actually like.
4. KAT-TUN - Rescue
One word: kuroi |||||||||Orz I like their new album songs better, although both "One Drop" and "Rescue" were okay. I think I liked "Rescue" because it was different to their usual style. And also when I watched the PV I was wowed by the fact that they could actually dance! Even though they started out as backup dancers! But all they do these days is just flap their limbs half-heartedly! Actually, the only one I was wowed by was Akanishi, because he's never danced properly in a group setting ==;;;;;
5. Arashi - My girl
I had to put an Arashi song since they've bagged out the top 5 Orz I didn't like their songs this year as much as last year's, and I probably liked Ohno's solo and "Ashita no kioku" better...but I like the PV for "My girl". It's so sweet. AND THEY CAN ACT. In fact, I spent more time watching than I did listening and so I don't know how good (or bad) the song sounds.

When I first heard "Ashita ga kuru nara" I was a bit torn between two minds about it. The piano bit in the beginning is so beautiful, but once the drums came in it started sounding like a typical pop song.

I thought I'd grow tired of it over time, but it's become strangely more addictive ~~;;;

And today I finally saw the promotional video and nearly fell off my chair.

EITA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and

EIKURA NANA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, so it looks like the 239048572335th Asian drama/movie/show about someone young and beautiful and happy until they're suddenly struck with terminal disease but.

EITA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and

EIKURA NANA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Actually I'm not too big on Nana-chan, although she did grow on me in Mei-chan no Shitsuji and her smile is so infectious.

But.

EITA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

（這人有完沒完？）

Damn damn DAMN DAMN damn DAMN

I hate wasting tears on stupid shows that go out of their way to make you cry but.

Eita T^T ....Will I do it for Eita? T^T

I can't wait til he's back in Nodame because his last two dramas were just tearjerkers. Last Friends was so sickeningly depressing and Voice made me cry every episode =_______=

Damn. Now my impression of the song totally changed too ==; I thought it was a happy love song.

Edit (11/05/09): I've made a mistake with the name of the guy who killed Nobunaga...oops. Sorry guys LOL. It's now been fixed.

I'm going to Brisbane in a few hours so I'm sorry if I haven't been able to reply some of the messages/emails/comments. Hopefully I'll have access to the internet over there but I won't count on it.

So this is the last post before I get internet again, and it is a lesson in Japanese history! (Liar)

Yesterday Kame's new solo "1582" was leaked and I just want to make this post so that people can stop calling it "the perfect song for Twilight", thanks ="=

Right before the song was released, there were two conjectures:

1. 1582: the year in which Oda Nobunaga was killed in the famous "Honnouji Incident"
2. 1582: "15"=ichigo "82"=hani. i.e. Strawberry honey.

The only thing that had the second theory going was that Kame loves strawberries.

But the first theory was the most likely one because of a number of things:
1. Kame (and Jin) always named Oda Nobunaga as their favourite historical figure during the Sengoku (warring states) period.
2. Before the song was leaked, Kame said that it was strongly Japanese flavoured (liar).
3. The songs starts off with rapid tapping, which sounds like Japanese togs running. It also talks about arrows and blood and death, which would fit with the siege.

The lyrics more or less confirm it's not about strawberry honey, which means it's most likely in reference to the Honnouji saga.

But then it gets creepier from here on.......

( Oda Nobunaga and his favourite page, Ranmaru )

結論是，1582是陳述性格隨便不拘小節的仁被對冤仇耿耿於懷的大親友山P刺殺，導致小龜跟著殉情。找不到倆人尸身的山P越來越神經質，遭受衆叛親離，甚至被斗真嫌棄，最後身首異處死在山溝 （錯錯錯！！）

Edit
I just want to add a few things:
In the March issue of Potato or Duet(?), Kame said that he was still choosing his solo. One has to keep in mind that the interview probably took place at least a month earlier. Jin (and Maru?) said that they were also still looking.

I want to add this because I'm a bit sick of people saying "Care" is something Jin fell back on because a new song he wrote was rejected. The interview suggests that neither Kame nor Jin had anything concrete decided. Taguchi and Ueda both said in the same interview that they had something prepared themselves. Frankly, I'd rather Jin go back to his old way of writing, rather than writing things of incredibly poor taste.